I met Grover where I usually meet new dogs---in our Receiving kennel, where we hold stray dogs for the mandatory 5 day period to give their owners time to come in to claim them. As I walked through the kennels I saw a beautiful blue brindle Pit Bull mix (you know I am a Bully Breed lover) cowered in the floor, literally pressing his body against the wall like he was trying to go through it to get away from me. He was shaking, and not a normal "I'm a little freaked out" shake. Literally, every inch of his body was vibrating with fear, from his head to the end of his tail. Initially I thought he must be having some kind of mild seizure so I called my coworker, a Vet. Tech. We got a leash on him and literally forced him to stand up, to make sure that he wasn't injured. He seemed fine, except for his fear, the likes of which I have never seen.
I began my usual routine of trying to give treats, approaching him in as non-threatening a manner as possible, talking in low, soft tones. It wasn't working. The fear in this dog was too big for me to overcome with simple tricks. I got cans of moist food with chunks of meat, offering them to him by tossing them near him in the kennel. At first, even that was too much for him. He merely moved farther away. I would leave, come back, and the food would still be laying in the floor. I had almost decided that I couldn't help him. I didn't have the experience, or the time. I made up my mind to give it one more day, a few more attempts but I couldn't even be in his line of sight without causing him to tremble in terror. This dog, I told myself, would be a fear biter---a dog who would bite not out of outright aggression, but because he literally feared for his life and safety when humans were around. He wasn't safe and I couldn't trust him.
The last day of his stray hold I came through and noticed that he was actually making eye contact with me for the first time. I thought hey, what the heck, and got my trusty moist dog food, crouched down outside his door and opened it a crack, slowly. I reached in and tossed a morsel of food to him. He looked at me, looked at the food, and cautiously ate it. Still trembling, still scared, but this little victory was huge for both of us. After a couple more bites off the floor he moved closer to me, crawling, never confident enough to stand. I took a chance--I held a piece of food in my hand. I didn't stick it in his face or do anything that he might think was scary. Just put it in my hand and waited, watching closely, aware that I needed to be careful. He looked up at me, slowly leaned over and licked the food off my fingers.
If you have never worked to rehabilitate a dog that is scared out of it's wits, you can't understand the feeling I had at that moment. It is a rush. It is a wave of relief. You feel absolutely honored to have won a dog's trust, against all odds, in an environment that is unfortunately extremely stressful to a dog like this. I wanted to keep working with him and see what would happen.
Over the course of the next few days I kept at it when I had time. First priority for me has to be the well-being and health of the animals at BCAS as a whole, so the little "projects" are something I work on when all is taken care of. Eventually I could walk through the kennels and get a slight tail wag. He was happy to see me, at least a little. Then he would come to the front of the kennel. When that happened, I knew the tide was really turning. I could open the door of his kennel and actually pet him. One night I wanted to see how he would do when exposed to new people, a new space. I took him into our treatment room where my coworkers were. I sat in the floor and he sat right beside me, his body pressed into mine. Still scared. He would take treats from my coworkers for the first time though. Huge.
Grover is improving still. He still takes a moment to warm up to strangers. Never aggressive, just submissive. He is most comfortable when I am around, but I'm trying to distance myself a little because he is becoming too bonded to me. He LOVES playing with other dogs and seeing him play like any dog would was an absolute joy.
I'm so proud of Grover but I'm also still so worried. I think a dog like him needs to be in a home and won't fully blossom until that happens. With so many other extroverted, happy-go-lucky dogs, who in their right mind would take on such a project? I know that this boy would be hopelessly devoted to the next person who gives him the love that he needs. I can only hope that if I was willing to trust Grover and in turn earn his trust, that there is someone else out there who might be willing to take the same leap of faith. I hope that Grover will never tremble again. I hope that he will finally be confident enough to meet strangers without fear. Most of all, I hope that he one day will know the constant and deep love of being a part of someone's family. That will be one happy day for both of us.
